


Do You Want To Know A Secret

by HideYourDrowseAway



Series: Words of Love Series (Maylor) [1]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: 'beard couple', Bisexual, Breakup, Evil Ex, Gay, Letters, Love, M/M, Originally on Wattpad, bois and gorls can be frens okay, brian gets a tad sad, everyone likes bois, freddie learns guitar, freddie why did you pick paul, homophobic ex, roger is blind to brians love, they do be music bois tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 7,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29190420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HideYourDrowseAway/pseuds/HideYourDrowseAway
Summary: Writing has always solved Brian's problems. Whether it was writing about his bad day or his shopping list. But will writing help him to get over his hopeless crush on Roger?______________I originally posted this on Wattpad under the same user
Relationships: Brian May & Chrissie Mullen, Brian May/Roger Taylor, Dominique Beyrand/Roger Taylor, Freddie Mercury/Paul Prenter
Series: Words of Love Series (Maylor) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2143095
Comments: 10
Kudos: 10





	1. ☆28th of August☆

I have always used writing to help me out.

Sad. Write about it until I feel better.

Angry. Write about it.

Lonely. Write about it.

Seeing how it has helped me before it should help me know. Here it goes.

Roger Taylor, you are my best friend, the person who makes me want to wake everyday. The way that I look at you seems to be different than how I look at John or Freddie. With you, one glace fills me up with these butterflies that I can't seem to explain. 

I think I have a big secret I need to tell you. Are you ready because it is a big one.

I think that there may be a chance that I see you as more than a friend. But I don't see why you, for starts I'm not gay. I have never felt the way I feel about you with any other man. I know I love you but it always seemed like a brotherly love. 

Oh what a mess I have gotten into. Hopefully by writing this letter I won't feel this way about you anymore. I just can't. It will break up the band and worst of all, it would probably break up our friendship.

Now with that said, I'm going to sign this letter off and seal it away never to look at it again.

-Bri

_-_-_-_-_

With that Brian slipped the piece of paper into an envelope and stuck it between his bed frame and mattress, thinking that he will be able to move on from this silly feeling. 

Little did he know that this was only the beginning of the pile of letters full of secrets.


	2. ☆2nd of September☆

Hello, again Roger. I guess that you can tell by this letter that my previous one didn't work. I thought that it had at first since I felt nothing but friendship towards you when we met up a couple of days ago for lunch. Boy, I was wrong.

I felt the same old 'Roger is your mate Brian' feeling that I had always had until band practice this afternoon. It started off normally with Freddie showing up late and everyone showing the ideas we had for songs. With John sitting listening whilst eating cheese and crackers. And you, sitting and listening from behind your drum kit, fighting to get your ideas heard. That wasn't what made me realise I still see you romantically. All of that was normal.

It was after we went to work on 'Son and Daughter' and you showed us what you had in mind for the drums, I knew that my previous letters hadn't worked.

I saw you counting the beat each time you hit the drums, a look on your face that was a mixture of concentration, relaxation and ecstasy. The sheen of sweat that was forming on your forehead along with your blue eyes shining and your long blond hair jumping around your face as you drummed. You looked heavenly.

I know that it isn't right for me to be thinking this about a man, especially my best mate but I can't stop it. I am really hoping that nobody catches on with my emotions before I can get them sorted. Hopefully, this letter will work better than the last one.

Yours  
-Bri

_-_-_-_-_

Brian repeated his actions from several days ago and sealed away his letter, the pile now consisting of two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second Chapter here and slightly queer. Hope you enjoyed it. 
> 
> If you have any constructive criticism of this that you would like to happen either message me or leave a comment.
> 
> Thanks for reading


	3. ☆7th of September☆

Hello Roger,

I am writing to you yet again to express how I feel about you. Yet again my other letters didn't work but I have come to notice that I definitely do like you more than a bandmate and certainly more than a friend.

It really hit me at Freddie's party this weekend when you showed up with that girl Dominique on your arm. I felt jealousy boil in my stomach but I put it aside because I am a good friend to you. Also the drinks I had made it easier for me to ignore you.

My plan to drink my jealousy away was working until I watched you lead her into one of the guest rooms, with that sly smirk you wear when you know that you have won your girl over. Watching you through the twilit room take a girl off to give her a night of pleasure is what caused me to head home. 

I stumbled along and went back into my flat barely remembering to lock the door behind me before I passed out onto the lounge. 

Whilst I was asleep I dreamt that it was me that you took into that room. You showed me more pleasure than I had felt with any girl I had been with. You confessed that you too felt the same about me. 

I should have known that that was a scene of calm before the storm. I woke up with my head pounding like the way you do in your solos. I sat up to get pain killers to steady the insistent beat within my skull. 

After that, I went back to sleep. In the time I had been in a dreamless slumber I had several missed calls from you and a message saying you had good news.

You told me that you were now dating Dominique. It felt like you had just taken your drum sticks and stabbed me in the heart. 

But as I have said before, you are straight. And most of all I have no chance with you at all. 

Hopefully, my feelings will lessen if not from this letter but from seeing you with someone who makes you happy.

\- Bri

-_-_-_-_-_-

Brian capped his pen, wiping the tear that had escaped his eyes away, not wanting to smudge the ink. sealing the letter, he placed it under his matters where two letters became three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Three has arrived. I hope you liked it. Sorry about the more depressing tone, I'm not feeling my best lately.
> 
> aNyWaYs enough about me.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed. A big thank you to each of you who is reading this, it means a lot to me and puts a smile on my face when I see the notification for a vote, comment or an add to a reading list.
> 
> Any questions leave them below


	4. ☆13th of September☆

Dear Roger,

I'm writing yet again because seeing you with Dom is painful. When you invited me out for drinks I had expected it to be a one on one hangout with just you and me. If only that was the case. 

You acted as if it had slipped your mind but I knew it didn't. You forgot to tell me that it was a double date that you and Dom had organised. Of course, that date for me was a blind one.

Dominique's friend Chrissie was pretty just not my type. As the night went on I could feel the awkwardness radiating off both Chrissie and myself whilst you and Dom sat, staring into each other's eyes, oblivious of anything else.

How I wish that was me. Chrissie and I both left early, not because we were tired like we had told you, but because we just didn't feel a spark. Whilst I walked Chrissie home like a gentleman, she confided in me that she wasn't into guys. Thank god. 

This brunette woman told me how she had been tricked into coming on the date by Dom the same way I had. I guess it must be a small world. I told her my situation and she gave me a look of sympathy. I guess the one thing that came out of this night was the possibility of a new friend.

Bidding Chrissie ado, I left to walk back to my flat, fantasising about you and I walking hand in hand down the moonlit streets of London, looking at the few stars that can be seen in the sky. Thinking of this I realised that I would rather see you happy with another person than unhappy alone. No matter how much pain it caused me.

I think I love you Roger Meddows Taylor and I as much as i want to be with you, I know that you are happier with Dominique.

\- Bri

_-_-_-_-_

Brian signed the letter, written with a steady hand and placed it into a new envelope, sealing it with ease. He repeated his previous action, lifting the mattress, adding to the pile that was now four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked the new letter. I decided that I wanted to involve a blind date but make sure it wouldn't go anywhere, so I guess that Chrissie is now a lesbian.
> 
> Do you think that she should reoccur in Brian's letters? Let me know here.


	5. ☆21st September☆

Hello Roger,

I tried to put the feelings i have for you aside, I mean if you're happy I should be happy? It is really hard, watching you and her together all the time, the look you give her. How I wish that was me you were gazing at with your beautiful blue eyes.

We all know that that will never happen though. 

I've been hanging out with Chrissie a little bit. She is quite nice.

It turns out I found another animal enthusiast and also someone who I can be frank with about how I'm feeling. She gave me some advice and suggested that I should find a new hobby to take my mind off things.

I tried to follow her advice by taking up photography but all I can think of is you being the subject. I guess I'm head over heels.

It's been a bit tough lately with my feelings for you and also the stress of the band along with my job at the record store. It's almost like I am a juggler trying to keep my problems in the air but each time I push one aside, a new one replaces it. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if I keep this up I will be the looser in the end. It is really weighing down on me and I don't know what it is but I have been feeling numb to everything that used to bring me joy. 

Anyway, I hope that I will get better and that my heart will accept what my brain hasn't, that you are with someone that makes you happy and that someone isn't me.

With Love,

-Bri♡

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Sealing the letter, Brian stared out of his apartment window towards the sunset, colouring the sky an array of oranges, realising that the brightness of the sky had no impact on the darkness he was harbouring within himself.

Arising from his stariaghtbacked chair he walked glumly over to his matress, lifting the corner, sliding the envelope underneath and completing the glum ritual he had unintentionally created for himself. 

Dropping the matress, Brian laid down on his bed, wrapped himself into a cocoon within his duvet and fell into an unsteady sleep, dreaming that the warmth he was surrounded by was not from his blanket but from Roger, the man he would never hold within his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for another day
> 
> I hope you enjoyed.
> 
> What do you think about Brian's feelings at this point?
> 
> Any set circumstance you would like to occur?
> 
> Would you like Freddie and John to come into the story and play a bigger part?
> 
> Just let me know through a comment :D


	6. ☆30th of September☆

To my blue-eyed angel, Roger,

I am writing again because I have news that you would have found out if you hadn't ditched us to hang out with Dom.

Whilst we were at the pub gathering that Freddie had organized for a "special occasion", Deaks and I were told some important news and told our own.

Freddie had sat us down in the dark booth in the corner by the toilets away from any prying eyes. I could tell by this that it must be important since our frontman always tries to be close to the bar and the spotlight. His other tell was the anxious look on his face partnered with him declining alcohol of any form.

Whilst we sat and waited for you to show my mind started to wander towards what Freddie could possibly have to share that deserved this kind of formality and cautiousness. 

My thoughts were interrupted by the publican calling out to me, saying that I had a phone call. I arose and walked over to the bar, grasped the phone, and felt an eruption of butterflies in my stomach when I heard your raspy voice through the receiver. That feeling of nervousness was replaced by disappointment though when you told me you were out with Dom and couldn't make it. I should have known.

Marching back to the table, I realized that I was the messenger who had to tell our best mates where you were. After doing so Freddie decided that you would find out his news at a later date.

Oh Roger, if you had been there tonight I doubt I would have had the guts to also announce something.

Freddie took a deep breath and told John and I that he was in fact gay. After the words left his mouth I could tell that he was full of fear, scared that we would shun him, kick him out of the band, pretend we had never known him. The shock he must have felt when he was met with smiles. The joy he showed on his face when I rose from my seat to give him a hug to show my support. 

It was here that things changed and my courage to repeat what our friend had done grew. Deaky announces that he too had to tell us something, that something was that although he did love Veronica, he also liked men. That utterance was met with equal compassion from Freddie and I whilst also fueling my desire to tell them, two of my closest friends that I too liked men.

I felt the breath leave my lungs and told the two men that I also liked men but also like women very much. with that revelation, it was as if a weight that had been sitting across my shoulders was lifted off. This feeling gave me a high, I felt like I was flying and could take on anything. I felt better than I did after playing Red. 

If you had been there, I doubt I would have been able to do that, but now I realize that if you were there I wouldn't have to tell you alone. 

Roger Taylor, our two best friends know I'm bisexual and I don't think that I can tell you, the man that I love, that you are the reason I came to realize this, the only man I find physically and emotionally attractive, the only man I have ever thought of in a sexual manner.

Some day, one day, I hope I will be able to come out to you but even then I doubt that I could tell you how I feel, or anyone other than Chrissie, that I am hopelessly in love with a straight man who has a girlfriend. 

\- Bri ♡

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Brian folded his letter and placed it into a new envelope, feeling the high from earlier in the night to a lesser extent, wishing that Roger had been there, that he could have told his mate that he likes men.

Arising from his bed and placing the book he had been resting his page upon onto the floor, Brian lifted the corner of his mattress adding to the collection of notes that he had written to the blonde he held closest to his heart, the man that he wished would be the one to lay beside him on that very mattress, the man he wanted to hold him as he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Chapter is here and quite queer. Hoped you enjoyed the inclusion of Freddie and Deaky. For the next letter, I'm considering adding some smutty content. Let me know what you think of that here (If there is I will put a warning lol) ----->
> 
> If you had any situations or events to occur like a get-together or a hang out between Brian and one of the other band members just let me know. 
> 
> Also do you think I should include Deacury or go with Jimmcury and Johnica? 
> 
> Thanks for reading my guys.


	7. ☆17th Of October☆

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Warning: Sexual Content***

Dearest Roger,

Have I written about how you make me feel physically? I don't think I have. 

Recently whenever I see you at band practice, beating those drums, your hair flying around at first and then sticking to your sweat covered face, I can't help but think is that what you would look like in the bedroom?

Your body moving against mine, both seeking and providing pleasure. You taking charge over me, guiding me in our lovemaking.

I can't help but think of you pinning me against the wall, trailing kisses around my face, moving down towards my neck, sucking and biting, marking me as your own. You would tease me, cupping me through my trousers, grinning when you feel my erection.

Do you know how much I find your body attractive?

Your lean frame, toned from years of drumming, your blond hair framing your face like a golden halo, your eyes, gleaming like saphires. From have seen of you Mr Taylor, I can tell you that you are a sight that has beauty that can only be compared to the stars in our sky.

Roger Meddows Taylor, in the simplest terms possible, I want you to fuck me.

The only problem with that is that you are a straight man in a relationship whilst I am a bisexual man who is still in the closet to his best mate.

How did I end up in its mess.

Love

-Bri♡♡

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Brian rose from his desk, noticing the tent that had formed in his pants, sealing the envelope and stowing it under his mattress, he made work to relieve himself, thinking of the blonde drummer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short Chapter but its an update none the less.
> 
> I'm going to start writing the Halloween chapter now and I have three possible ideas.
> 
> Would you prefer angst between Roger and Brian
> 
> OR
> 
> Some Roger's POV
> 
> OR
> 
> For some angst that Bri witnesses between Rog and Dom
> 
> Let me know with a comment and the top one by the 22nd will be the one I write about.
> 
> Also idk how I did with the more smutty parts so sorry if its crummy. If you have and criticism let me know :)
> 
> Thanks For reading lovies
> 
> \- Teahn


	8. ☆20th of November☆

Dearest Roger,

It has been a while since I last wrote one of these silly letters to you. A lot has happened in the past month. To start with there was Freddie's Halloween party.

Just like any other year, it was an event that deserved all of the praise it was given. This years theme was drag. To save the rest of the band the hassle of finding costumes, Freddie had nominated himself to shop for the items each of us would need.

The setting up for the party went as planned with the coloured streamers lining the walls of Freddie's flat. The food and drinks were placed on the dining room table. Music was playing softly until the guests would arrive later in the afternoon. 

Our costumes were as outrageous as I had imagined, Deacy was dressed as an older woman with a black coat, I had my hair in curlers and a pink nightgown on, Freddie wore a black wig that complemented his moustache along with a pink top, short black skirt and some black pumps. Each of us had our chests stuffed to give us the appearance of having breasts. 

Your costume ROger was the real gem of the night. When you walked in I didn't recognise you at first. Your hair was long and tied up in two black bows, your face made up in a way that any woman would envy. Your clothing, a white blouse tight over your brassiere and a pink and yellow tie on top of that. The skirt you wore was short enough that I could see that you had decided to wear women's underwear with your costume. It took all of the self-control I had not to drag you into the back room and do unspeakable things to you. 

The night went on and as more guests arrived I realised that by far you looked the best. Of course, you spend the night with Dom draped over your arm, dressed in a suit and tie with a bald cap. Seeing you with her make me drink more than I have since I turned 18. 

The more shots I had the more I felt calm, almost accepting until I saw you walk out with her, early. The high I had crashed down and I knew that if I didn't drink more I would do things I would regret in the morning. After you left I recall doing a round of shots and then nothing. 

According to Deacy I did a striptease on the coffee table and proceeded to pass out once I got to my underwear. I'm lucky to have a friend like him who would put me to bed in a safe place. I'm sure Freddie would have but he was as far gone as I was and last I recall he was straddling a man sporting a similar moustache to himself.

So as you can tell Halloween was an eventful night but it is the aftermath that kept me occupied. I had slipped into an emotional hangover of sorts afterwards, nothing bringing me joy. It wasn't until you told the band that you were going on a month-long holiday to France with Dom that I realised I needed to find a source of income.

You left the week after Halloween and that same day I applied for a job teaching part-time at the local school. After finding out that I had gotten the job and I would have something to occupy my time even if it is for only 1-2 days a week I could feel myself coming back from the despair I was in. 

All that I can say is that I hope you enjoy your time with Dom in France and that when you come home everything will be back to normal.

With love

\- ♡Bri♡

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Signing off, Brian put the letter into an envelope, sealed it and placed it under his mattress. Gathering himself before he headed off to a day of work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys long time no see. I have had a few things happening and one thing lead to another and I realised today that it had been over a month since I have updated. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. 
> 
> Any feed back that you may have leave here ---->
> 
> Anything you want to happen next leave here ----->
> 
> I have a brief idea of what is going to happen next but it will mean that there will be only be 4-5 chapters left. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading, commenting and voting. It really makes my day when I see people enjoying my works.
> 
> -Teahn


	9. ☆2nd December☆

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ****(TRIGGER WARNING: HOMOPHOBIC SLUR)****

Roger my love,

Yesterday you came home from your trip with Dom early and alone. I have to say that it definitely got my hopes up. 

When you showed up on my doorstep looking defeated I had to say that although my hopes were increased, I put my own selfish thoughts aside. You were still one of my best and oldest mates, I had to help you.

Last night we sat on my couch and channel surfed until we found something to watch. That was how we ended up watching Clockwork Orange whilst drinking our own sorrows away.

By the end of the film we both pretty drunk and that was when you told me everything that had happened.

With a noticeable slur and your blue eyes lacking their usual luster, you told me about the ski trip and how Dom's brother had decided that he would bring Dom's ex-boyfriend. One thing leads to another and you had caught her sneaking off with him. To get back at her, one night when everyone had been drinking, you snuck off and ended up sleeping with her brother. 

This caused a nasty reaction from the rest of her family and she decided to get back with her ex because 'He isn't a poof like you'. This resulted in you catching an early flight home, chased by the wave of homophobic slurs that the Beyrand family threw at you.

When you told me that I was torn between my emotions. On one hand, I was happy that you were no longer with Dominique and that you had an interest in men, but on the other hand, my heart was broken at the anguish you were feeling.

I know that if you were sober you would have struggled to tell me about that night. But it seemed that liquid courage had allowed both of us to reveal something about ourselves.

I told you that it didn't matter that you liked men because I do too. When I told you I was bisexual I felt that familiar calm wash over me.

As I am writing this letter, you are asleep on my fold-out couch, looking as if you are still the young man I met all those years ago, all of the worry having left your face. You look at peace.

I really hope that you feel better soon but I know that it will take some time. I also know that the chances of you dating me a slim but of course my nieve self can't help but hold onto a small glimmer of hope,

\- Bri ♡

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Brian sealed the envelope that he had put his letter into and crept off to his bedroom, not noticing that his blonde visitor had noticed him writing and that he was now curious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter is done. 
> 
> Thank You all for reading this it means a lot. 
> 
> I hope you are enjoying it. 
> 
> -Teahn


	10. ☆ 9th of December ☆

Dearest Roger,

This past week, since you got back, has been eventful. The price of both of our rent has gone up and seeing as we can't seem to get any gigs we are a bit stumped for money. While my teaching job pays the rent, I have no other money left for the other amenities and food.

To try and solve this I asked you to move in with me. Although I only have a one-room apartment, the bedroom should be big enough for two single beds. It shocked me when you said yes.

So you moved all of your stuff out of your old apartment and we went on the search for two single beds. You also told me that your recent breakup leads you to start working with Freddie in one of the clothing stalls in Kensington. This added that little bit more money, that when shared, covered all of our costs.

Yesterday was the biggest shock. I came home from work, thinking about how much I should hide my letters from you when I walked into our new shared bedroom. You had cleaned it. I immediately bolted towards my bed seeing that it appeared untouched but I had to be sure. Lifting up the corner of my mattress I took a look at the letters and saw that they looked fine and all sealed still.

Anxious about whether you had seen them I decided I needed a new hiding place. That is why the panel behind the microwave is now loose and filled with a shoebox, filled with letters.

Judging by the way you acted when you got home, you hadn't seen the letters, for that, I feel foolish but at least it is better to be safe than sorry.

In other news today we got summoned to go to Freddie's house for a 'Surprise that will knock your socks off Darling'. I knew that it would have to be good and that it would be the perfect opportunity for Fred and Deaks to come out to Roger.

When we arrived at the flat, Freddie was beaming. When he saw that Roger had actually come he was even happier. That was until he found out why he was home. Roger explain the story, including all of the detail. I could see the anxiety on his face when he told the rest of the band that he slept with Dom's brother and when he said he was bisexual. At that moment I understood why he was feeling so anxious.

The shocked look that came over his face when Freddie and Deaks laughed was priceless. It got even better when Freddie concluded that we really are a band of Queens. That was when we all laughed, Roger catching on that all of us fancy men.

After we calmed down a bit Freddie got to the real news. We have a huge gig at some rich guy's New Year's Party and if we do well he has connections with a few recording studios.

I was ecstatic when I found out and John looked as if he was going to faint.

Now I am at home and you are in the living room watching something on the couch, the high of actually finding a place to play and the possibility of getting a record deal keeping both of our moods high.

Until next time  
-Bri♡  
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-  
Brian sealed the letter, a grin on his face, and walked over to the microwave, opening the wall and putting the letter with its brethren in the shoe box.  
Little did he know Roger watched his every move, knowing what he was writing, planing on how to deal with the new-found knowledge he had gained from those letters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter done and only a few more to go.
> 
> Thanks for reading it means a lot to me.
> 
> Questions and Ideas below
> 
> As some of you have seen I will be writing a sequel to this and it will be Rogers POV.
> 
> Thank you again for reading
> 
> -Teahn


	11. ☆ 28th of December ☆

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning Homophobic Slur directed to ones self

Dearest Roger,

I can't believe I was so stupid. I thought that I had hidden my letters well enough that you wouldn't find them. I was definitely wrong. To be honest I don't even know why I'm even writing this. I guess it's a force of habit.

The lead up to Christmas was the same as any other year. Shopping was being done, gifts wrapped, homes decorated and food being prepared. For us, we also had band practice thrown in there so my stress levels got higher as the 25th approached.

We figured out our setlist for New Years' and worked to polish it so that we could play it in our sleep. We practiced to the point I noticed You tapping the rhythm to our songs on whatever your hand was resting on.

The only day we didn't have practice was Christmas Day itself. The band got together at Freddie's apartment, shocked by the presence of the man Freddie was with on Halloween. Apparently, they had begun dating. I think his name was Paul.

Each band member brought something to the meal with John handling the meat, Freddie handling sweets and you bringing drinks and me bring the salads. Lunch came and went quickly and the anticipation for gifts grew within our group.

Sat in the living room we all began unwrapping gifts. First went all of the gifts for Freddie. He got a lavish coat, a few cat toys, a bottle of Moët Chandon, and a box for that Paul fellow that he turned bright red at. Next was Deaky's gifts. There was a Disney themed T-shirt, some bass strings, and a sandwich toaster. Then came your presents. Drum sticks, a ticket to a car race, and a new pair of sunglasses.

Lastly, it was my turn. From Freddie I got a stereoscopic card, John gave me a new set of guitar strings for red and your present gave me the biggest shock of all.

I peeled off the wrapping paper to find a box that looked like it held some new shoes. I was wrong. I lifted the lid and was faced with all of the letters I had written you, the flaps on the envelope opened. I felt all of the air leave my lungs and the world went black.

Next thing I knew I was 10 blocks away at the park sobbing into my hands laying in the dirty snow. It felt like my life was over.

Around 10 minutes later John showed up and walked me over to his car, offering me his lounge to sleep on for the night. Little did he know that it would last two nights.

Practices were more of a struggle for me. Before I couldn't look at you because of the threat of a blush rising in my cheeks. Now that blush is from the embarrassment that you found out that I not only like you Roger Taylor, but I also love you.

Last night I decided that I would be an adult in the situation and come home. It was awkward coming home to the house cleaner than usual apart from the pile of your bedding on the lounge, an obvious sign you were vacating the bedroom to give me space.

You tried to explain yourself but I know that I can't hear that you don't want to sleep in the same room as a poof like me. When I told you to drop it you looked like a kicked puppy and I almost let you explain but I know that I couldn't let myself get hurt by you confirming my suspicions.

I guess we will see how things play out.

Love  
-Bri. ♡  
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-  
Brian sealed the letter and put it in his pillow, hoping that Roger wouldn't find it.

Heartbroken himself, he didn't hear the muffled sobs coming from the lounge room.

He didn't know that Roger was forming a plan to get his point across to him...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed what will either be the last or second last chapter of this book.
> 
> What was your favorite part so far?
> 
> What do you think Rogers's plan is?
> 
> What did Paul get Freddie?
> 
> Any questions leave them below
> 
> Also, I was thinking of doing a Q&A chapter once the final chapter of the story is posted. If you would comment any questions here for the Q&A it would be appreciated.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading. It puts a smile on my face whenever I see that someone so much as votes on my little story.
> 
> -Teahn


	12. ☆︎31st December ☆︎

Dear Roger,

Things between us seem to be back to normal if you ignore the awkwardness that seems to creep its way into our conversations.

I can tell that you are trying to put Christmas behind us but I can't look at you without thinking about how you know how much I adore you.

Each day you head over to Freddie's early for practice and Each night after we get home from the practice you insist on cooking dinner for the two of us.

Although it is nice to have someone cook for me for a change, I can't help but think that I owe you something for the week that I have put you through.

I almost feel like you deserve the world for how you have bounced back from being dumped, outed, and finding out that I like you way more than you thought all within the space of a few months.

Maybe I'll shout you a few beers tonight to try and make up for how understanding you are. I guess that the way you have reacted to my childish behavior shows how much of a wonderful person you are, it shows how anyone would be a fool to let you go.

I'm writing this in our room while you are at Freddie's again, doing some final preparations for tonight, making sure your costumes and drums are perfect. No doubt you are easing Freddie's anxieties on whether we will perform well enough to land a record deal.

I guess all I can do is wait for tonight to be over and wait for the new year to come.

Love  
-Bri♡︎

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-  
Brian sealed the letter and hid it away. Pick up his garment bag and picked up Red's case, ready to make his way to Freddie's apartment to have one final rehearsal before the night that would change the lives of those close to him in more ways than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all. Thanks for reading again.
> 
> The final chapter will be out later today (Aussie time).
> 
> Happy New Year everyone.
> 
> I you have any questions you know the drill. Leave them here.
> 
> Thanks for all the comments on the last chapter. It was lovely to read all of your guesses of what Roger has planned.
> 
> Until later today
> 
> Teahn.


	13. ☆︎1st January☆︎

Dear Roger,

I have to say that last night was one of the best nights of my life.

As I said in my last letter, I was nervous, it was a huge night for us as a band. After practicing at Freddie's for the last time we all got into our costumes and piles into the band van, you driving us to our venue.

Although the party wasn't supposed to even begin for another few hours there were people moving about the large garden, setting up tables, arranging decorations, placing directions towards the small bars that were placed around the perimeter of the area.

The stage was set up closer to the large mansion that made a modestly sized family home look like a rundown shack. The lighting seemed much more extravagant than we were used to.

Time passed quickly and before we knew it sound check was over and we are preparing to go on stage to entertain the crowd filled with influential people.

Walking into the spotlight it almost felt like I was floating. When I began playing the constant practice paid off and my hands went into auto-drive and I let myself move around, putting my all into my stage presence.

As I danced around I turned and saw you drumming. The impact it had on me was almost immediate if I hadn't have remembered my cue to move to the start of the stage I would have frozen and watched you play all night long.

We continued to play and midnight came closer. We were told that once the clock reached 11:30 pm we were to finish so that the DJ that was hired for the countdown could begin his set.

We finished our last song and I went to take a bow as we had rehearsed. After we all went off the stage I was shocked to see you still on the stage but at the microphone and Freddie with a guitar in his hands.

You announced to the audience that you had one final song install for the audience dedicated to one special person who you had a misunderstanding with that you wanted to make right. With that Freddie began to strum the guitar and you began to sing.

For a moment I was in so much shock that I couldn't comprehend what I was hearing. Then as your voice became clearer I understood what you were playing.

"You'll never know how much I really love, you'll never know home much I really care"

As your raspy voice sang the words I felt a wave of confusion. Who is this song for?

"Listen, do you want to know a secret?  
Do you promise not to tell?  
Whoa-oh-oh, closer  
Let me whisper in your ear  
Say the words you long to hear  
I'm in love with you, ooh"

"Listen (doo da do), do you want to know a secret? (doo da do)  
Do you promise not to tell? (doo da do)  
Whoa-oh-oh, closer (doo da do)  
Let me whisper in your ear (doo da do)  
Say the words you long to hear  
I'm in love with you, ooh"

"I've known a secret for a week or two  
Nobody knows, just we two"

As you progressed through the song I realized you were probably singing for a girl you had met. I went to walk off the stage when John told me that I should stay to at least congratulate you and Freddie on the performance. Not everyone could pull off a cover for a Beatles song.

So I waited, growing more anxious to leave before whatever groupie you had found came to take my love away from me.

I clapped when you finished and congratulated you and Freddie before leaving under the premise to go to the bathroom, just to get away from you.

I walked off and went to get several drinks and sat at an unoccupied table, realizing I would go into the New Year alone again.

At around 11:50 I noticed you walking around looking distraught. I knew you probably had someone better to hang out with but I walked over to you anyway.

I was caught off guard when you broke out into a relieved smile when you saw me.

I will never forget when you told me that you wanted to talk to me in private. My alcohol addled brain jumped to conclusions but the small rational part of my put the scenarios to rest quickly. He wouldn't do anything like that with me of all people, I told myself.

We went into one of the guest rooms inside and you shut the door. My brain was in overdrive again, thinking of every possible situation that might occur.

I stunned when you asked, "How did you like your song?"

My song. What on earth are you talking about?  
I felt like I had taken something and what I was hearing was some kind of hallucination.

When I asked what song, you laughed, and muttered something about me being the smart one in the group.

I have to say my heart stopped when you walked up to me, the space between us getting smaller and smaller.

When you said in a husky voice that sent shivers down my spine. "Do you want to know a secret? Promise not to tell?"

You moved closer to me, our chests pressed against each other. "Let me whisper in your ear, say the words you long to hear."

By now your arms had snaked around my neck and your lips were close to my ear, so close that your breath tickled me as you said: "I'm in love with you".

As you said that, you began to pull away, giving me a moment to comprehend what you had just said.

I looked up at you, focusing on your blue eyes, the hope that you wouldn't be rejected. Then my gaze drifted down towards your lips, the ones your beautiful voice travels through. I walked towards you, the chants of the party-goers in the background, counting down until the clock struck midnight.

'FIVE'

I took a step

'FOUR'

My heart begins racing fast than before.

'THREE'

I wrap my arms around you again

'TWO'

I look up at you again, gazing up at your eyes

'ONE. HAPPY NEW YEAR'

Our lips collided in a feverish manner and the fireworks that lit up the night sky were nothing compared to the ones that I felt at that moment, the warmth of your lips, fitting perfectly with mine, moving together like some kind of forbidden dance. Hands moving through hair, attempting to make out two bodies one, close not being close enough at that moment.

If you were to ask me how long we stood in that room held in each other's arms, enjoying the kiss that had been a long time coming, I would say not long enough.

It was when there was a pounding at the door that we sprung apart startled and worried about being caught.

The door had creaked open and Freddie and Deaky poked their heads through, grins painted on the faces.

It turns out that a friend of Elton John was here tonight and that friend happened to be John Reid. He was offering the band a record deal and time in a recording studio.

Thrilled with the great news, we moved towards each other at once, embracing each other and shouting out in joy.

After our excitement died down, you and I told Freddie and Deaks the news about the song. When they laughed I was taken aback but soon realized that they were both in on your plan. They knew all along that you had feelings for me, most likely for longer than a week or two.

As I said before, last night was a night of surprises all of them pleasant.

Roger, it no longer has to be a secret, I am in love with you.

-Bri♡︎

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Brian sealed his letter sitting it on his bedside table. Turning over in his bed he moved back under the duvet, snuggling closer to Roger wearing a content smile on his face.

He was happy he didn't have to keep his love a secret from Roger anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last letter is done.
> 
> How did you like it?
> 
> Thanks for reading it means a lot to me.
> 
> Also, I know that Freddie barely knew how to play guitar but lets just pretend that he was very invested in Maylor.
> 
> Quick question: Would you like an epilogue of sorts that would help set up for the sequel P.S: I Love You?
> 
> Also if you have any questions I will hopefully post a Q&A chapter.
> 
> Thanks so much again for reading. I didn't expect any one to read this at all and I get a pleasant surprise whenever I get a notification.
> 
> Happy New Year to all and I hope your 2021 is better than your 2020 was.
> 
> With much love
> 
> -Teahn


	14. ☆︎Epilogue ☆︎

Dearest Roger,

I am writing this letter not to vent my unrequited affection for you but to give to you as a gift.

After New Years' we started dating, and along with the new found happiness that we found together, Queen as a whole had their spirits lifted once we started recording.

The late nights in the studio were taxing for all of us but the exhaustion of staying up all night and trying to get by financially all day was overshadowed by the joy we all felt playing together, recording tracks, tweaking lyrics, and spending time together as a whole to make something we can all be proud of.

After the release of our first album, we went on a short tour and the crowd loved us. I have to say that we were all shocked by the number of girls that called our names and tried to sneak backstage.

Freddie's short stint on guitar never made a reappearance although we did perform what had been dubbed our song a few times in encores.

The life we had begun on the stage was nothing compared to our domestic relationship. The days that we lounge together watching films and eating Chinese takeout are among my favorites.

We are due to move house soon. To a house that all four of us will share in order to "provide maximum creativity" or something. I think that it was Freddie's way of having people to share the rent.

With all of the changes happening in our lives I have to say that my favorite is waking up every morning tangled in your arms. I love you Roger Taylor and I'm happy that it is no longer a secret.

Love

-Bri ♡︎

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is folks, the final chapter of Do You Want To Know a Secret.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> I would like to thank you all for coming on this journey with me. As you can probably tell by looking at my profile I'm not the best at updating books.
> 
> As for a Sequel
> 
> It will be titled P.S. I Love you and will be from Roger's POV. Here is a short blurb of sorts:
> 
> Heartbreak occurs at times that a person least expects it. For Roger Taylor, it happens when his boyfriend Brian is in a car accident and is left in a coma. The anxiety of not knowing if he will see his lover's hazel eyes again or hear him sing on stage, Roger takes a leaf out of Brian's book and turns to writing to attempt to ease his pain whilst staying connected with the man he loves.
> 
> Expect to see the first chapter up sometime in the next week.
> 
> Thank you all again for reading and voting it means a lot to me.
> 
> If you have any questions about this book or the sequel let me know.
> 
> -Teahn

**Author's Note:**

> Authors Note:
> 
> I hope you liked the first chapter of Do You Want To Know A Secret.


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